Most of my posts have been random rantings about various trivial events I find humorous. I don’t like to get too sentimental or too deep. But something very serious and very sad has happened, and I cannot at this time be trivial.My dear friend and once roommate Angela Lemaire died on Sunday, October 28th. Please go to www.bluer.org to see a tribute page to her. I will miss her with all my heart. Anybody who knew her will miss her. I look forward to being reunited with her when my time in this life comes to an end.
“It’s Labor Day”
So, last night I was pumping gas. A gentleman who was walking past me said “How do like $3.09 a gallon?” I said “I don’t like it at all!” He then replied “Well, what are we gonna do?” I replied “It’s Labor Day!” You see, I was completely confused by his comment, until I realized what he actually said. He asked a rhetorical question, and I thought he asked me to comment on the high prices. I thought that because Labor Day is coming up, the gas prices went up. Maybe that’s true, but it had nothing to do with his comment. By the time I realized I made no sense, I wanted to get his attention and correct myself. But by then, it was a good 20 seconds later and the time had passed. I could have either told him what I meant by the comment, or let him go thinking I’m a weirdo. Either way, he would have thought I was a weirdo, trying to correct myself. Maybe the next time someone comments about the weather, like “How do ya like this weather we’re having?” I will respond with “I like candy!”
Anyway, this story so amused me I thought I’d share. Happy Labor Day!
An ad…
Free to a good home:
A lovely pair of black spandex shorts. Only been worn once, and then immediately taken off. Past owner did not realize they were spandex when she purchased them from the clearance rack at Target. Past owner thought “ooh, nice. I could use these to work out.” Past owner immediately regretted the purchase when she brought them home. Previous owner did not keep the receipt, so previouse owner is stuck with a pair of spandex shorts she will never wear. The spandex shorts are cute and cuddly, and current on all its shots. Also, it is housebroken. So no unwanted accidents!
Public Service Announcement for 6/30/07
I suppose it’s time to update my reader (s) on what’s been going on in Anna Land. Well, besides what strange things are going on in my head. I wouldn’t even know how to get into that.
I am happy to say that I can once again hear out of my right ear. For those curious, my hearing had been blocked by a pesky ball of wax. After sitting at the doctor’s office last Friday, having three different nurses and one doctor look at my ear and say “Wow!”, I still couldn’t hear. So, a lot of people gave me a lot of suggestions. One person (who shall remain nameless, but the one who gave birth to me), suggested I try stool softener for the ear. Yep. Stool softener. How it works: you cut the tip off the capsule and pour the liquid into the ear. With some help outside of the doctor’s office (thanks, Judy), I can hear once again. And, my ear is now regular and enjoys a healthy high-fiber diet.
Tattoo dreams
I had a dream last night that I got like 3 tattoos on my arm (I can’t remember which). One was a ring of flowers around my upper arm. I can’t remember what the second one was. The third one was all along my arm and it said “New Englander.” Note: I have never been to New England, except to Boston. I have no family or friends in New England. But, I sure loved the tatoo in my dream! Don’t worry, Mom. I didn’t really do it.
“Huh?” Part II
The title of this post is a sequel to a post I wrote on Feb. 11th. If the rest of this post is to make any sense, please refer to the Feb. 11th post titled “Huh?” Actually, you don’t need to. But if you want, it would add spice to this post. Kind of like pepper.
Anyway, so now it’s just about officially summer. Today was around 90 degrees, and plenty hot. I wander into a caribou coffee shop to purchase myself a tantalizing iced coffee. My eyes immediately fixate upon the fireplace THAT WAS ON! What is this crazy world coming to? So, maybe one person was cold. I mean, the AC was definitely on. Let’s call her “Penelope.” Penelope, if you’re cold, you can always sit outside where the nice baristas at caribou have placed tables and chairs. I don’t mean to judge, but don’t turn on the fire place if the AC is on and the temperature outside is hotter than it is inside. I did ask the guy taking my order why the fire place was on. He replied “I have no idea.” He seemed OK with it, though. I think I’ll be OK with it– I just need a few minutes to compose myself.
A “serious injury” story
OK, so here’s an example that we live in a sue-happy society:
At work tonight, I was rinsing out a soup can to put in the recycling bin. Stupidly I put my finger inside to get some of the remnants out. Anyway, I cut myself as I slid my finger past the sharp edge. It was just a little cut; something I wouldn’t think twice about under normal circumstances. But because I was at work, I had to report it. My supervisor had to ask me if I needed stitches or to go to urgent care. (Seriously, the cut is no more than 1 centimeter long). I had to fill out TWO reports, including one called a “First report of injury.” I wouldn’t have reported it, but my coworker said I should just “in case.” In case what? I suppose I could get gangrene (sp?) and my finger would need to be amputated. But it was per the non-use of common sense that I got this “injury” in the first place. I do think it would have been funny had I been made to go to urgent care, and been given antibiotics in case of an infection. That’s a good use of tax payer money! Well, not “funny.” Maybe the right word is “irritating.” At least I didn’t have to go.
I’ll keep everyone posted on my finger’s healing progress! No, I won’t. I’d rather blog about roses or something, of which I know nothing about.
“Aha” Moments, case study #1
I was listening to the radio the other day, and this song came on. I think the band’s name is ELO and it’s probably circa 1972 or something. Anyway, I have been familiar with it for some time but had absolutely no clue what it means. I thought the lyrics in the chorus were “Believe a woman.” In fact, I just found out the words are “Evil Woman.” The way the dude sang it sounded like the former. I think that it should be “believe a woman.” You better believe it!
Mother’s Day memory in the corner of my mind…
I just had a funny memory– I don’t know what precipitated it. But it’s too great not to share with whoever reads this.
Several years ago, my mother, sister and I attended our church’s annual Mother-Daughter Banquet. It was usually pretty sappy (any Eastsiders reading this?). Anyway, part of the night’s festivities included a slide show of the participants’ photos of when they were little. Each slide included the name of who that person was. So, when my mom’s photo appeared, there was a picture I had never seen before: a cute little baby with a phone to her ear. I remember after the slide show, I told my mom how I had never seen the picture before, but it was really cute. She laughed and said “that wasn’t me. I didn’t have a picture of me on hand, so Sherry (the organizer) found it out of a magazine.” The weird part is that the baby really resembled my mom! I’m glad that memory came back to me. It will delight and amuse me the rest of the night.
A “Dear Abby” Debacle
I’m not even sure I wrote that word in its correct context, but it sounded nice. Anyway, I was reading a “Dear Abby” column from about a week ago, and stumbled onto this doosy (I’ll paraphrase so as not to make it too long):
“Dear Abby,
I have a 4-year old…he acts up…nothing working, such as timeouts…so I found that if I smash one of his small toys with a hammer it works well. Do you see any danger in this type of punishment?”
Of course, Abby said it was a traumatizing way to punish a child (well, duh!) It’s not a funny column (I mean, poor kid!) but this woman’s sheer audacity to write this in a column did make me laugh. I mean, who is she? The Godfather?
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